Today, in Eugene, OR, the unveiling of the headstone for my mother-in-law, Gloria, took place. In Judaism, this ceremony usually occurs 11 months after a person's death. It's hard to believe it's been almost a year since her passing, that her house was broken down, and that other people are living there. I wish I could have gone to support my sisters-in-law, but to be honest, I really don't ever want to be in Eugene again. I did promise Jude I would come when the boys are Bar Mitzvah, but I don't want the years of good memories to be marred by trips that will not produce those kinds of memories.
Instead, to honor her memory, Lou and I planted 40+ bulbs today. She always loved flowers, her beds beautifully planned and tended. Though we tend to have a "wilder" look to our beds than she preferred, the daffs will come up next spring and sway in the breeze and perfume the air drifting into the house, and I will think of her and how much she meant to me. She actually told Zelda that I was more stubborn than she was. I'm not sure that's true, we never really went head to head on things. When she visited, we did things her way. When she wasn't around, we did things our way. She was definitely an "Ashet Chiyel", a woman of valor, and I will miss her.